Scouting the Newly Acquired Holden Joseph Flynn

Heyyyyyy World



As with anything the statistical breakdown tells the story.

Name: Holden Joseph Flynn

Nickname: The Tin-Man

Birth Date: 10/11/11

Time: 7:46AM

Length (at birth): 18 inches

Weight (at birth): 4 lbs 13 oz

Hair: Strawberry blond (Has more than his dad)

Eyes: Blue/green

Average feeding: 2oz delivered from Le Boob de Nicole

Diaper size: Newborn. (we ran out of Premmies)

Average dooks per day: 4.2

Average weight per dook: N/A (mom wouldn't allow me to do it)

Split second uncovered wang during diaper change firehose pees per day: 1.3

Head control: Swivelly

Hands: Edward Sissorhands-ish

Foot control: Kicky

Sleep: Holden's sleeping pattern can best be described as deep. He probably wouldn't notice an A-Bomb if it detonated 3 inches from his ear. He generally sleeps anywhere from 2-4 hours at a time. If he wakes up it is usually because he's hungry or he has farted loud enough to shake himself awake.  

General likes/dislikes: Holden likes to feel confined. I'm guessing elevators shouldn't be an issue in the future. He also likes attacking his own face, and if swaddled will find a way to get his hands free to continue his own special grooming. His only real dislike is in the form of socks despite the fact that his feet are ice cold without them. It helps that he has such long and narrow feet, likely inherited from his mom, because the majority of dad's family has every wide, somewhat hobbitish feet.   

Overall Roundup: This kid is a stud, like his father. 

Flattering, very flattering



Born'd